A jeans story and a fashion tip

Last week I split a pair of jeans. I mean, I knew I was feeling like a blob having not been running for a while on back mishap, but I didn’t think I’d quite reached the splitting-my-pants point yet. They were actually jeans I’d bought at Vinnies, and were perhaps more worn than I realised, so last week when I went to sit down with one leg bent under me (and you’d think I would have learnt by now not to sit like this), the jeans sort of got stuck on my knee, there was that ominous tearing sound and they split somewhere up near the backside. Shame. I loved those jeans. They were some American brand, they fit nicely and they were ridiculously long, which is why I bought them. Even I had to roll the cuffs up.

Anyway, since I am walking home from work now I walk right by a Vinnies store, so I popped in on Friday afternoon, just to have a quick squizz for something my sister was after actually, and once in there I did a scan of the jeans rack. How I look for jeans in op shops is just scan along the bottom and see if any are hanging longer than the rest. There are usually so many pairs jammed along a rack that I don’t even begin looking unless I have lots of time I feel like killing, and the owners of pre-loved jeans do wicked things and take the hems up. But I did spy a pair, dangling down below all the others. I pulled them out and they were GAP jeans, 34 inch leg, looking like they’d never been worn. So I tried them on, and thought they actually looked alright, as far as jeans go. Except, here’s the thing: they were called “skinny flare”. I am in the dressing room looking at myself in the mirror thinking ‘what is skinny flare? isn’t that some kind of oxymoron? is that a real jeans category? are these remotely fashionable or will I look like I got lost on the way to the 1970’s?’.

In the end I couldn’t resist the fact that they were long, and they looked new, so I bought them. (I think they might be a size up on my usual, which would explain why they fit, because what I don’t have is “skinny” legs - usually skinny jeans don't get up past my calves, but the flare is working for me here.) Then I had to come home and google “skinny flare”. It turns out I might be right up there on the cusp of fashion people! Apparently, last Spring, in the Northern Hemisphere, where all style comes from, the skinny flares made an appearance. Look at this line up of who is wearing skinny flares! I don’t know who half those people are, but I am pretty sure they are style Queens. It would seem I have Kate Moss (I've heard of her) to thank for the emergence of this style of jean.

So I am feeling alright about these jeans now. When I went to wash them and give them a bit of a scrub in certain places (my Mum, who's one of those hygiene people, thinks it’s a bit disgusting to wear things that have been elsewhere on other people, so I assure her they get the necessary sterilising) I could tell by the way the water was glancing off the fabric that they have never been washed before. Bonus. Hopefully I won’t split them any time soon.

So everybody, now is the time you could help me look trendy, not to mention be uber trendy yourself, and get yourself a pair of skinny flare jeans. (Then if you decide they are really not for you - though why you'd want to when skinny jeans are so last year and flares are the thing - you could make them skinny all over following these instructions. And if you are going to hem jeans, for the sake of tall people in op shops, do it that way please. H/T The Pipers)