Poetry Friday VII
I am on holidays at the moment, and back in the world of dial-up internet, so this blog is going to be more neglected than usual for a couple of weeks. However, I thought I would attempt poetry Friday. So here is a poem, previously mentioned, by Dietrich Bonhoeffer. If you are unaware of his story, he was Christian German theologian who became involved in a plot to assassinate Hitler, being one of the seeming few who saw the hideous truth of Hitler’s campaign against the Jews. Bonhoeffer was subsequently executed himself. I think it is encouraging for the rest of us to know that these spiritual giants also had their inner worlds where all was not quite so fearless and unshakeable, and yet they acted with great trust and steadfastness regardless.
WHO AM I?
Who am I? They often tell me
I stepped from my cell's confinement
Calmly, cheerfully, firmly,
Like a squire from his country-house.
Who am I? They often tell me
I used to speak to my warders
Freely and friendly and clearly,
As though it were mine to command.
Who am I? They also tell me
I bore the days of misfortune
Equably, smilingly, proudly,
Like one accustomed to win.
Am I then really all that which other men tell me of?
Or am I only what I myself know of myself?
Restless and longing and sick, like a bird in a cage,
Struggling for breath, as though hands were compressing my throat,
Yearning for colours, for flowers, for the voices of birds,
Thirsting for words of kindness, for neighbourliness,
Tossing in expectation of great events,
Powerlessly trembling for friends at an infinite distance,
Weary and empty at praying, at thinking, at making,
Faint, and ready to say farewell to it all.
Who am I? This or the other?
Am I one person today and tomorrow another?
Am I both at once? A hypocrite before others,
And before myself a contemptible woebegone weakling?
Or is something within me still like a beaten army,
Fleeing in disorder from victory already achieved?
Who am I? They mock me, these lonely questions of mine,
Whoever I am, Thou knowest, O God, I am thine!
Dietrich Bonhoeffer